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 Disobedience to Parents

What is the state of an offspring before Allah who disobeys and maltreats his parents?


Allah commands man to treat parents well

“And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents” (Surah al-Luqman, 14)
Exactly 13 times in the Holy Quran, Allah (swt) enjoins upon man well treatment towards parents. Besides, disobeying and rebelling against parents is one of the major sins called “kabair”.

The punishment of maltreatment towards parents is given in this world

Narrated Abu Bakr:
“Allah respites whatever He wants of the sins until the Day of Judgment save showing disrespect to one's parents; it will be hastened to its doer.” (Asbahani, Hakim)(I.e. the worldly punishment before the Day of Judgment)
As narrated, when Prophet Jacob entered the presence of his son Prophet Joseph, he didn’t stand up for his father. Thereupon Allah (swt) revealed the following revelation:
“Do you regard standing up for your father as a sign of derogation? I swear by My Dignity and My Grandeur that I will not send even one prophet from your descendants.” (Ihya-u Ulum-id Din)

Behaviors which are regarded as disobedience against parents

When Ka'b Al-Ahbar was asked about the meaning of showing disrespect to one's parents, he said,
"When one's father or mother swore an oath and he or she did not fulfill it. When they ordered him to do something but he did not obey. When they ask him for something and he refused. When they entrust him for something but deceives them.” (Major Sins, Hafiz Dhahabi)
Those who rebel against parents, even if they obey Allah (swt), are written amongst the rebellions
Allah Almighty (swt) told Prophet Moses that:
“O Moses! I write my servant who rebels against me but treat his parents well (obey them) amongst the obedient; I write one who obeys Me, but rebels against his parents amongst the rebellion servants.” (Nasai, Ahmad, Hakim, Abu Dawud)
The Prophet (pbuh) said,
"Shall I tell you of the worst major sins? Worshipping others with Allah, showing disrespect to parents, giving a false statement, and testifying to the truth of a falsehood. " And he kept repeating it until we were telling ourselves (out of sympathy for him because of the strain of repeating it), "If only he would be silent.” (Bukhari, Muslim and Tirmidhi)
“Making parents cry is rebelling against them and it is of the major sins.” (Ibn-I Omar)

Anger of parents is the anger of Allah Almighty (swt)

"Allah's satisfaction is the parent's and His Wrath is theirs.” (Tirmidhi)
Allah does not accept the fard and nafila prayers of the one who has rebelled against parents
“Allah (swt) accepts none of the obligatory and optional worships of three people. They are those who disobey parents, who rub their favors in and those who do not have faith in destiny.” (Ibn-I Abi Asim)
“Whosoever looks at parents in an angry way, even if they have tortured him, Allah (swt) does not accept his prayer.” (Usul –u Kafi)

The avail actions of who rebels against parents come to naught

“Any avail actions will be null and void in the presence of three actions:”Associating partners with Allah (shirk), showing disrespect to parents and fleeing from jihad.” (Tabarani)

The offspring who disobeys parents cannot even smell the fragrance of jannah

"Will never smell the fragrance of Paradise, the one who disobeys parents, yet its fragrance can be smelt at a distance of five hundred years journey.” (Tabarani)

He who disobeys parents will not taste the blessings of paradise

"Four classes of people will be prevented from entering Paradise nor will they taste its blessing as Allah decreed: the drunkard, the usurer, the one who appropriates the orphan's property without a lawful cause and the one who was disobedient to his parents.” (Hakim)
"Three people, Allah will deprive them of Paradise; the drunkard, the one who shows disrespect to his parents and the pimp who admits what his family do of abomination” (Bukhari, Tirmidhi, Muslim)
“Whosoever disobeys parents cannot enter the paradise.” (Nasai)

Lifespan of who disobeys parents is shortened

Wahb Ibn Munabbih said, "In the tablets written by Allah to Musa is the following,
'O Musa! Respect your parents. Whoever respects his parents I will extend his life span and grant him a grateful progeny. But, whoever shows disrespect to his parents I will shorten his life span and grant him an ungrateful progeny.”
Ka'b Al-Ahbar (ra) said, "Allah hastens the death of anyone who shows disrespect to his parents so as torture him. On the other hand, Allah increases one's life span if he is kind to his parents to bless him."

He who does not respect his parents is in the curse of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)

The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said:
“May Allah curse him who shows disrespect to his parents." (Al Hakim)
Abu Huraira reported Allah's Apostle (pbuh) as saying:
” Let him be humbled into dust; let him be humbled into dust. It was said: Allah's Messenger, who is he? He said: He who sees either of his parents during their old age or he sees both of them, but he does not enter Paradise.”

Reviling parents is of great sins

“Reviling parents is of great sins” (Bukhari, Muslim, Abu Dawuud, Tirmidhi)
"May Allah curse he who reviles his father; may Allah curse he who reviles his mother.” (Imam Ahmad, Nasai)

It was also narrated that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,

"In the night of Isra' (Night Journey) I saw groups of people in the Hell-Fire hanged on trunks of fire. I
asked, "Who are they, Gabriel?" He said, "They are those who revile their parents in this world.” (Major Sins, Hafiz Dhahabi)

He who prefers his wife to his mother entails the curse of Allah

Reported by Ibn-I Hajar al Haithami
"O Muhajirin (Emigrants) O Ansar (Helpers), he who prefers his wife to his mother entails the curse of Allah, His angels and the whole people. Allah never accepts his deeds or a reason unless he makes repentance, treats his mother well and asks her consent. This is because Allah's consent is conditioned on the mother's and His wrath is hers.” (Shamil İslam Encyclopedia)

The livelihood of who abandons praying for his parents is cut

“If a servant (of Allah) abandons praying for his parents, his livelihood in this world is cut.” (Shamil İslam Encyclopedia)
“All acts are requited with something similar to them.” al-‘Ajluni, Kashf al-Khafa’
“O man, come to your senses! You too will grow old if you do not die young. If you do not honour your parents, as stated by, “the punishment is similar to the act that required it,” your children will not be dutiful towards you. If you want to secure your life in the hereafter, here is a rich treasury for you: be dutiful towards your parents and win their pleasure! While if it is this world that you want, still try to please them, for thanks to them your life will be easy and your sustenance plentiful. But if you are contemptuous of them, wish for their deaths, and wound their sensitive and vulnerable hearts, you will manifest the meaning of the verse “They lose both this world and the hereafter.”(Surah al-Hajj, 11)
If you want the mercy of the Most Merciful One, be merciful towards those in your house whom He has entrusted to you.” (Treatises of Light, 26.Flash)

He who beats parents is deprived of mercy

Imam Jafar Sadiq (ra) stated that:
“He who beats parents is far away from the mercy of Allah (swt); he who rebels against parents is far away from the mercy of Allah (swt). (Mustadrak-ul Wasail)

Those who went out to jihad without their parents' permission and martyrizde( became shahid) stay in the Araf

Ibn 'Abbas was asked about Ashab Al- 'Araf (men of the Heights) and he said;
"As for the Heights, it is a mountain between Fire and Paradise. It is so-called because it outlooks Fire and Paradise. It is also covered by trees, fruits, rivers and wells. As for the men who seized thereon, they are those who went out to fight in the cause of Allah without their parents' permission and then are killed. Death in the cause of Allah protects them from the Hell-Fire. But disobedience to their parents deprived them of Paradise. Thus, they will be on the Heights until Allah judges them. (Major Sins, Hafiz Dhahabi) Kaynak: http://askaquestionto.us - Disobedience to Parents

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