" Family "
If the Parents Order Haram, Does One Have the Right to Disobey Them?
If parents prevent obeying the orders of Allah (swt) or try to dissuade from Islam, how should one behave in this case?
If the parents are preventing from obeying the orders of Allah(swt), one has the right of not obeying his/her parents.
Even if the parents are disbelievers, still, one must show them the concerns and treat them respectably in a humane manner. One doesn’t have the right to treat others in an inhumane way according to what they believe or don’t believe. Treating them badly just because they don’t believe what you believe is inhumane.
But if the parents are preventing from obeying the orders of Allah (swt) and if they compel to commit sinful (haram) actions, he/she has the right of being disobedient towards his parents. Indeed, he/she must not obey them in this case. Nevertheless; he, still, should pay the greatest attention to the orders of Allah on showing the best manners to the parents. It is obligatory to be kind to one’s disbelieving parents, even if you don’t love them, but you still must treat them according to Islam.
Loving them is one thing, and good dealing with them is another different thing
“Asma' bint Abu Bakr reported: My mother who was a polytheist came to me when he (the Holy Prophet) entered into treaty with, the Quraish (of Mecca). I inquired from the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) saying: Messenger of Allah, there has come to me my mother and she is inclined; should I (in this state of her mind) show her kindness? He said: Yes, treat her kindly (keep ties with your mother.)” (Kitab-uz Zakat: Book 005, Number 2195)
Thus, worldly affairs, business dealings, compensations, and exchanges (of good treatment) between Muslims and disbelievers in beneficial affairs that do not affect the Religion are permissible. Similarly, diplomatic representation between embassies is also not harmful. The polytheists used to send messengers to the Prophet to negotiate with him. These kinds of affairs are not things that show loyalty; rather they are merely permissible affairs of benefit between the Muslims and the disbelievers.
"Allah does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with those who fought not against you on account of religion and did not drive you out of your homes. Verily, Allah loves those who deal with equity.” (Mumtahinah, 8)
That the child must obey whatever parents command doesn’t mean that he must obey them when they order him Islamically prohibited actions. Most ulama (scholars) are in agreement on this matter. Actions which are doubtful require obedience of the parents. And there is no need to obey them in case of any prohibited actions are ordered. Because avoiding from doubtful things are taqwa. But obedience towards parents is a certain command.
Qur’an puts an end to this subject as the following:
“However if they strive with you to make you ascribe on Me partners that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not; Yet nicely possess them in the world! And follow the path of those who tend to Me! In the end, only to Me is your return; then I will notify you all that you have been doing.” (Loqman, 15)
The commentary of this verse (ayah) was made by Imam Kurtubi:
“Both in the issues of committing a major sin and quitting a command which is fard-i ayn (individual obligatory). In the issues which are regarded as mubah (neutral) one must obey his/her parents. (Al-Jami’ul Ahkamu’l Qur’an)
“And We have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents, but if they strive to make you join with Me (in worship) anything (as a partner) of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not. Unto Me alone is your return, at that time I shall inform you of what you have been doing.” (Ankabut, 8) Kaynak: http://askaquestionto.us - If the Parents Order Haram, Does One Have the Right to Disobey Them?